1881-03-05; Clare County Press

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LARE
•$1.50 per Year. Always in Advance.
VQLUME III.
TICK »BAI> HOOK.
Th« moon is in a slnto of decrepitude, a d*n<3
»orid—P, odor j Ze, tures.
The moon is .lead- tWnuci—played out—
So says a vmy learned doctor;
Bho lookctii well, beyond a dmiht;
Per Imps she's In a trance, dear Procter,
At any rate, she's most entrancing
For oue ot such decrepit age;
And on her radiant beauties glancing,
Sho charms tlio eyes o£ youth and stigB,
And so the man upon hnr'n perlihedl
He lived in doleful isolation;
Poor wretch!   Ivo wife bis bosom cherished,
Ko children equalled hia consolation.
Vet she's ndored by all the uypslei,
Whose lovers slgli beneath her beimw,
She aids the steps of staggering tlpste*,
And silvers o'er romantic streams.
And once she caught F.ndyniion sleeping,
And stooped to kiss him in a grove,
Upon hini very slyly creenlm;;
Ho was her ftrst and early hive.
But that's a very ancient sioi-v.
And was a youthful indiseretlon,
Whch she was in her primal jrlory,
Ere scandal schools had held a session.
Dear, darling moon!   I dote upon her,
I watch her nightly in tbe bky;
But oh? upon my word of honor,
I'd rather sho were dead than I.
: morning.    Ohl our hours ara from liaJtf-
I past eight te aii."
i How I got into the street I don't remember. X was so happy to think I had
at last obtained empl-ayment. and such a
good salary; yet I trembled a little at
the thought of my future master. Ho
would be difficult to please, and sharp
almost to rudenoss, sometimes; but
rather that thau too muesli politeness;
that I had been warned against, I had
actually gotten the situation without any
"references," for there iu my pocket
still remained the kind letter of recommendation from our dear old clergyman
at. home.
[     Tho first day was a wearysome one to
i me, and the crowning misery came with
tha adding up of my cash;   add, sub-
j tract, divide, do what I would, it would
not come right; and the knowledge that
Mr. Chisholm was furtively watching mo
did not mend matters. .At last-he. came to
; the rescue, and iu a few rapid strokes
showed me where the mistake lay,    My
CLARE, MIPt5^|aTUEI)AY,. MARCH 5, 1SS1.
•\LWA11J), Publisher.
NUMBER (k
This pain at my h&wt w*s
tolerable; it hud been there-n-
day. I began to realize what
Iwas anicliot, an arrant fool!
had been simply polite, and a littlo
fco me, and forthwith I had bcefo,
enough to fall in love with liim. .a1
raiy
-r-z
After thi* he was away from tha oiBoa
a great deal, ami wl»ea in it w»b fsjl nt.
pitas for £Ee future, "I was a good deal
puzzled by his manner; sometimes he assured me of his love for his future wife,
and expressed great hopes for his happiness,   then   again, would  sneer  at her
actually come to this; I was in 1?vc'lTP„'r I frivolousness, being gloomy and sarcas-
my master, who had never spoueij^u.t [tic; still he was uniformly kind to me, and
I felt sorry to see him'so tossed about by
\L      UOTVi     «!' - -   *rL-'*t
word of love to me iu his lifo, anu^jho
was going to marry another womrt\2 I
was thoroughly ashamed of myself^*tid
vowed T. would die rather thau he shield
know—my foot slipped,Ipitehedfor^Hl,
thon back in a vain attempt to re4*wr ,
my equilibrium, and settled BwMjply {
into a heap of soft snow, whilo my-wfc'k-
age flew ir, an opposite ■direction. 3f*ic'e
I made an awkward attempt .WaJBse,
when a pair of strong arms raistjclHH' a
familiar voice saying: ]fc*
"Not a comfortable time of thenar
for sitting out of doora." •  /
Then, while I brushed the ^nowMe-ni
my  droKS,  my master   picketTjjfy ^dy
ro T could olijwt^d
; other duties 1 found to be easv; to as- i parcel,  and beforo T could oljj't
sums n small share of the correspond- ! tucked my hand uuder his arm, unit >Vas
ence, to write letters at mv master's die- ; walking toward my boarding-honsrv   (I
MY MASTER AND I.
ay bjl2bahj0 xkchtox.
I
.r
tation, or to copy them for him after they
were written, wns light work.
He wns just, if sharp and strict, and
gradually becaino very kind to me; but,
■ he was a* man of moods, pu7.sr.ling me a
great deal at Iirst, until I concluded not
; to notice the changes in his manner, but
simply to try to do my duty. I could
see he was not happy, though I heard he
was much courted in society, and lived
' alone in a big, handsome house up
town, Soiuetini.\s, when we were not
busy, he would talk so pleasantly to me!
He had traveled a great deal, and possessed good descriptive powers, and rare
humor.    These occasions were treats to
;*me. Then, perhaps the very next day,
he would come down, dark and •tern,.
' hardly saying a word, or, it he did, some-
' thing bitter or disagreeable.
He was  a queer mau,  this master of
! mino, rough, polished, considerate,
sharp—each phase as strongly marked
as tho other. A masterful mau, too
much accustomed to having his own way.
Still I could not help thinking of him,
and talking of him a little to Netta,
when we were, cosy f„ni1   nappy in our
'■ little room.
One day I 'tied a black ribbon several <
times over my hair to keep some refrac-
wondered afterward how he knew ,\he
address.) ,   ,
"Mayn't I call and see yon somo opening when I am lonely? J'll be 1*3ry
good, and I do want to eome," v.'^t a
wilfulness in bis tone that mad4*n"*y
heart bound.
"Eesist
yon" had ..._.......
mv stop-mothor's: the "devil" in/'hi?
ease was my trail heart, that was olrjetfT-
ing so loudly forbidden fruit.   To '^'-'t
him. £ answered sharply, angrily:
"Xo.  sir,  you may not come!    ,.
must find some otiier way of reliWkJg j
your loveliness." ' " '  I
My master looked astonished, ftoyiit'J, .
and ihen laughed. \ • ,
Ton need not look so cross idw.uHt,
**"\TrANTED—A Cashier.    Mast  irrito   a
T V   pood hand, and bo intelligent. Apply
batween ton and twelve at — Broadway."
Such was the advertisement that met
my eyes as I looked anxiously over the
oolumns of   '' Female Help Wanted " in
tho Herald.   'l read it over twico, thon
out it out, aud put tho slip iu my pocket
book, determined to call at Xo. — that
morning.
i
There wore two of ;us, .Netta and my-
»elf; she was the child of my 8tex>-
mother, upon whose deatli she had come
to live with me. Neither of us having
any relatives able te help us, and veiy
little money, times wero very hard. So
for the past weeks, and, indeed, ever
■inco.1 came to the city, I had studied
the papers daily, and done a great deal
of traveling in answer to advertisements,
but without any good result. Howover,
I was not easily discouraged, aud, after
dispatching Netta to school, sallied
forth.
No. — proved to be a large retail and
stationery house.     "M.   A. Cliisholm"   tory. locks in"place, and in the midst of
was the sigu.    There were a number of | dictating a" tetter to me, my master said
clerks about;   to one I told my errand, ' abruptly: . - -, ,*,.-
i»nd was couditoted-to the upper end of ,     "That ribbon in yomjhair makes me * fltp-gptl)nr.?• IXpjC flip>
the long store, where,  stamhng aud ait- f think of a song my qipther--use'd,to sing 'r^?* ^VA"***"! T**'*,,
ting,  were some six or seven icmah*t   -^-apTnftthin^.aTkm'a'feVrOT^i^^^
         * - ■■vas&b&tffursi^^
awoitea-'v the. W6rds?"
I colored up and said I did.
like the name—Target—Janet," he
sorry
inward hopes and fears.
One night as I was getting ready to go
homo he said abruptly:
j     "My wedding   day is  drawing  near;
! will you come to the church to see me
married, JanetV"
"No, sir," I answeved, "I think not;
you know holidays are rare, aud if *I have
one on that day 'no doubt I shall iind
plenty to do at home, and you will be
married just as happily without my presence."
"No, I won't!" he cried vehemently.
"Promise you'll come, promiso, Janet,
or J declare I'll keep you here till you
do."
His fac<» was flushed; the hand that
barred my way actually trembled. I was
astonished, but not afraid.
"If you really wish me to come, of
course'!, will do so," I said, smiling at his
earnestness.
"Thank you, I do.   Good night, Janet;
t you are a good little girl; the brido shall
_m  delight «f both  our
helm, who
Miles senior is still eccentric, but there i
is perfect sympathy betweon   uh;   our
love has strengthened with each- year.
And I am truly thankful to the Great '
Giver who has  " caat my linos in suoh
pleasant places." !
PITH km POINT.
"•'"."Ii' i-i j i ,tn fw \ ,m , flt>11d vou an extra large slico of wedding
us the devil and hew« fl» ^» Cnko." And this extraordinary man
lad been _a favorite quotation! < Wwl ma ^ ^;n% n ^.]a
Keeping to the Bight. '
Persons going about in public places
should remember to "keep to tlie
right." This is almost everywhere the j
rule, especially for persons riding or
driving. In Englaud, it is said, drivers
pass each other on the left. They prefer this, because it enables each one to
see how near his wheels are going to ,
the otiier carriage. But throughout thi3
country the custom and law for vehicles
are to drive ou the right side. "When
oue is driving along a country road,
with no carriage approaching in front,
he can choose the best part of the road;
but, as soon as another comes to meet
him, he ought to drive well over on the
right-hand side. If the other vehicle'
does the same the two will pass in
safety. Yet one cannot always trust that
the other will do this. Suppose it is a
flock of sheep or a drove of cows which
one meets, or a house wliich people are
hauling along the road by means of
oxen, as is sometimes done in this country. Such tilings cannot be expected
to* keep to the right. Whoever meets
them must do tho best ho can to avoid
accident.     He must not drive to the
bowed me out with a smile.
The next day was Suuday.   Xetta and
I were  eujoyiug sweet,   pure   Parrar, j right obstinately, but must use common
when our small servant made the unpre-   sense.   Por a drove of animals a good
; way is to stop one's wagon /sntirely and
waiting j let them go  past  in their own way.
i Sometimes   one   meet3 an ignorant or
Much surprised, I wont down.    At the j rude person who will not turn out to his
foot of the stairs stood my master, hat in ! right.   It is not the law that one may
hand, looking sallow, gloomy and cross,    j drive into his carriage and break it, and
Janet.    You don't look prettv whmi £<m , ,   "WiU >'ou <Jn something for me?" he ; sfty, »I drove to the right and he ought
scowl.    Merry Christinas toT yoa!'' J>nd . "j'fK1","  '\     P.S^' wlt»out evp.n. oftennS : to have done so."   One must drive as
Von ! c°dented announcement:
"A gentleman for you, miss,
in the hall."
Merry (Jliristmas to  yoa
He was gone. . '   ?
Somo bitter tears wero shervihat vy
willi a protest against the ml'>>jjitv
life. * ~:/:SfW'
My one Christinas gift •%?* lyin
delicious hot-home {lowest-^ni?
been left for |tte bv an iUnfe»f>S^_
and which bxT^Iiteued"jfrtiF'irWSn
gladened our hearts 'ag 'i«?aj? i***
lasted
his  hand.    "Put   on your things and
came to the  Park with ine.   Don't be
prudish; let Miss Baymond go to the
dickens" (only it was a stronger word)
, "for to-day, and come help me get rid of
tho gloomy thoughts   that havo
pestering me all day.    Come. Jauet,  I
{.want you.   If yuii refuse, I'll just sit
I dowu here On this step and stay the rest
> j, j of the afternoon, and I think," grimly,
^j^.''entertaining me out of doors will bo the
V H*> *!».*fullvoaj%ble.ol.^eeprnj» his
M-Jt^'nith.him; I
£_%____? t.
my turn.
A little distance from us was an inclosed ofiice, wherein, no doubt, was the
party who was to decide the momentous
question; and as each oue went in and
came out with flushed or disappointed
face my heart sank lower aud lower, and
throbbed so when my turn came that I
could scarcely sx)eak.
As the ollice was dark the gas was
lighted; at a low, wide desk almost covered with papers and writing materials
sat a gentleman. He must have htard'
me eome in, but he did uot stop writing,
nor even lift his eyes: so, a low ehair
being near me, 1 quietly sat down, es-
aruing tirst the countenance of M. A.
Chisholm (for he it was), and then tlie
comfortably furnished ollice.
The geutleman was not at all good-
looking: Ite was very dark, sallow, iu
fact, with very black hair and heavy
mustache; the nose was too large for
beauty, the mouth and chin square aud
determined, the forehead prominent,
with creases between the heavy brows as
if from constant frowning; shoulders
broad and head well set on them. The
tout ensemble that of a man who would
not take thwarting kindly.
The surrouudings were a pleasant red
carpet, several ofiice chairs, two desks,
(one occupied), waste-paper baskets,
files, <to. My survey completed, my
gaze went back to Mr. Chisholm, when I
• was considerably disconcerted at meeting two keen brown eyes fixed coldly
»nd calmly on mo.
"Well," he said, presently, with extreme politeness (sarcasm, I callod it;,
"I trust you admire my office?"
"Yes, sir, I do," 1 answered, fceliug
uncomfortably warm.
"Humph!" alter another cool glance.
"So you would like to bo my cashier?
Know anything about arithmetic?"
"Yes, sir, something — not much,
though," trying in vain to steady my
voice.
"Write a good hand?"
"Yes, sir," wondering if my cheeks
•nd ears could possibly burn more. "I
write a distinct but not a pretty hand."
"Made np ot negatives, ell?" he que.
ried, sharply. "Are vou bright and intelligent?"
"I leave that for you to judge, sir," I
exclaimed, quickly, almost determined
to get up and go awav.
" Oh, you do! Well, if you get the
position you wdl have to sit at that desk,
take charge of the. cash, and write such
letters as I shall dictate to you, besides
assuming a part of the correspondence
yourself.    Now write your name there."
With trembling fingers I wrote my
name; never, ifc seemed to me, had I
done so badly; the "M" looked weak
and uncertain, while the "K" was decidedly broken-backed. My heart sank;
was that a good hand? I felt sure the
next words would be my dismissal.
He looked at the miserable scrawl,
then at me, with a scarcely concealed
smile.
"Well," he said, after a pause, "perhaps you may suit:_ at any rato you may
come and try. Now about salary,"
naming n s» which to my country ideas
seemed very generous. "Enough, eh?"
with a keen glance from uuder his
heavy eyebrows. " Cau N-on como tomorrow?"   Then   thnt  will   do.    Good-
|<«V^-F-JI^,_j,j.
'T
continued musing:' "I shall call you so in
future. I know it> uot yonr name, but
I like ifc—aud it suits yon."
Then lie continued dictating without
waiting for my assent.
So, after that wheu wo were alone,
and he wat in a genial mood, I was
'Janet.' and I did not dislike Ihe rimn.
Christmas Eve came. It had been
loug and very tiresome. Mr. Chisholm
hail beeu out nearly all day. It wauted
uow but a quarter to 13. I had put on
my cloak and hat, aud was slowly drawing on my gloves, when a quick step
sounded outside the office. ' The next
moment he entered, with the brightest,
happiest expression I had ever seen him
wear.
"Still here, Janet?" he cried, gayly.
"I hardly thought to lind you. Have
yon no purchases to make?"
"Yes, sir, oue," I replied, wishing with
all my heart that I had gone ton minutes
»arlier.    "1 am going now."
I was at the door of the ofiice when lie
called:
"Janet, come here."
"I have a purchase to mako, sir,"
without removing my hand from the
handle of the dour. "I shall be late for
dinner."
"Bnt I want to tell yon something; I
came back here ou purpose to tell you,"
he replied.
I walked slowly back and stood within
a few feet of him.
"I am wailing, sir."
He laughed.
"Congratulate me, Janet. lam going
to be married."
"To be mauried?" I repeated, vaguely,
! with, a horrible sinking at my heart, aud
conscious that my face was growing pule,
with   my master's   keen   eyes   looking
straight at me.
"Yes.    You see I have a big house up
town,  handsome and comfortable,   but
very lonely, Janet; Fve no one to bid me
good-by in the morning, no one  to welcome me home at night;  no happy, wee
■ wife, no merry, childish  voices to cheer
; my hoart; I am lonely, and I love a good
woman—so—I am  going to be married.
But   vou   have   uot   congratulated   mo
1 yet.'_'
'     "I do wish you joy, sir," T managed to
say with tolerable composure.
"Thank you," he   responded   almost
gleefully.    "Ah! my love ita rare  one,
1 good, pure,  and   lovely.    Wait  till you
' see her.    I shall show her to. you some
day, my little clerk, and I hope you will
' be friends."
This was too much.
"Good-evening, nil'," I exclaimed. "I
, must go now,"
;     "Good-night."   Ho walked to the office door with me,   then held out his
"Tie was angry. ' " * ' '• *tj*
Later in tho afternoon, Mr, Jar\!is
ushered two ladies into tlie ofllce. Ohe
was young and very lovely. Mr. Chisholm greeted them with cmpressemenl.
"The youngest one is Miss Bavmond,"
whispered tho head clerk, fidgeting
among my papers, "the lady Mr. Chisholm is to many."
■'Indeed!" T answered, bending over
my work.    "Ts it settled?"
"Oh, yes!" was the low reply. "I
hear tliey are tobe married in March."
She was a brilliant-looking woman,
but I thought, had I been in her place,
I would never have shown Mr. Chisholm
my piv-ference  so lavishly before strau-
wisely as he can to avoid doing mischief.
But it a person, driving carefully, runs
into another, who did not keep to the
right, all the blame will be on the other ;
. driver, and he will have to ]my damages. '
been i Therefore, it is particularly important to
keep well   to the right when turning .
sharp corners.
Por foot passengers on sidewalks tlio
rule is not so jiositive. In many couu- t
try places the sidewalks aio not very dis- i
tbictj or it is considered good manners to '
allow » lady, j»-j old person to walk by !
Ltfa^^flLf - 2a-all"largo/toWnS,- where !
might win hira to a belter mood: but I, hand side of the-walk shows thatho does
| also resolved, with a swift consciousness . not understand the custom, and seldom
; of my own  weakness, that it should be ■ gets along as fast,
i the firsfc and last time. After all, it! In cities foot passengers should keep
i would be better for me when Mr. Chis- \ on tho sidewalk except when tliey cross
I holm was married. j the" street at a crossing; they have no
By tlie- time we reached the Park he j business to lie on the street between
, was more amiable. Sitting on the plat- crossings, and if they go there it is at
■ form of the tower, we two alone, he told i their own risk. Howes and carriages
• me the story of his life. His father died j have no right lo intrude on the
I Biiddi-nly while Miles wns at college, j sidewalk. A boy in Troy was walking
! nrp-nfiT-nii"'- to frrndnrifp* he had bet'u re-
gers, or been content with such mocking j
homage as he rendered. His crossesfc (
manner pleased me more; this was too ,
light and free to suit me, but Miss Bay- i his life, aud, just as for
preparing to graduate
called to a darkened home, to find, when
affairs were settled up, that tho business
was iu a very bad condition. College
was given up, and he devoted all his
energies to paying off his father's debts,
and keeping his delicate mother and
sister in as luxurious style as before the
failure. It had taken the best part of
line really came
What this country wants is a patent
automatic telephone answerer.
People with badly-ventilated coal-
cellars are not admirers of Yoltaire.
The only hand in this world whicli
blesses those who grasp it is a full hand.
SmajjD dishes are decorated so handsomely now that pickles look unhappy
iu them.
Thermometers reform late in life ;
thev never become temperate until nearly GO.
Why is the American stage like tho
American eagle ? Because it has winga,
and flies, of course.
The principal of a young ladies' seminary in Syracuse has so exhaustingly
inflicted her pupils with •''deportment"
that, when left alone, her girls of 16 aet>
like sixty.
" Do xou favor my suit ?" said 01au'de>
to Augelina, the other day. " Yes," was
the crushing reply, "I look with mor©
favor on tho new'clothes than I do on
the owner."
Evbk the wisest is sometimes a fool.
For example, the philosopher who wore
his spectacles when he was asleep that
be might recognize friends he might see
iu his dreams.
Indiana, has a law to prevent weak-
minded persons marrying. A crusty
bachelor insinuates that the weak-minded or;; the only persons who ever think
of doing such a thing.
Patiiek Time is pictured as an o\&
and bald-headed gentleman, but he manages to skip around quite lively, all tha>
same, iu spite o£ being handicapped by
agricultural implements.
As exehauge frantically asks: "Ara
blacksmiths who make a living by forging, or carpenters,who do a little coun-
terlilting, any worse than meu who sell
iron and steei for a living ? "
A BACHELou at a banquet in Newcastle, Eng., gave tho loliowing toast:
"The women andrcoal of Durham county. Oh, how desolate our firesides-
would bo without them! "
Venice is the richest city in Italy-^t
is almost free from debt. And with all
those canals, too ! Tho Venetian Aldermen and State legislators are feal-fully
behind the age.- -Puck.
An impertinent fop made sport of an
aid, farmer's .'large  tiose,   mouth," and'
Ut thiHildfanACT silenced, lum
Ml  Iia€fTTf)7?tVenlailehiua
be material left for your cheek."
It takes a country school-master for
shrewdness. When the weather is cold
and the school-house imperfectly heated
he puts the head of the class nearest
the stove, and then all the scholars work.
lik« blazes to rank high in tlieir studies.
A gentleman once remarked to a witty
lady of lus acquaintance that he must,
have been bom with a silver spoon ia
month.    She looked  at  him
i        ,,       -1   - ii.        - v , ti   i his month.   She looked at  mm care-
along the sidewalk near a livery sable    Ml     md   wti     tlu, ^ ()f ld.s moutl
when  a horse eame walking out of the -,.      i- -,   ,,'-r -,,„.?  -, ,,,,l ■•.   ,,„,. •.        f
of.,i,i« „.ifi. ,i„ nn,. t^ i„„,i°i,im       Wic ' repb«l, "* don t doubt it; but. it must
have been a soup-ladle.
mond   appeared well  satisfied, flashing
bright glances, and tossing her queenly .
head in  a maimer that might have.bewil- ;
dered a stronger  man than niy master. I
Some grand ball was to take place within j
a week, aud she wanted him to meet her s
^ there.    At first he appeared unwilling, >
then he allowed himself to be coaxed in-;
. to consent.   I  saw her   slip her  small I
, hand iuto his in her thanks, then, amid \
\ gay speeches and merry laughter, he es-
| eorted them to their carriage.
t     "Well, -litnet,"  said Mr. Chisholm, a
, little later, with a sudden change of mau-
] ner, "what do you think of   Miss Bay-
I mond?"
within his grasp, dpath claimed his dear
ones, and he was left alone. His experience of life and people had not inspired
a very great trust iu his fellow beings.
I pitied him with all my heart; tears
were in my eyes when he held out
both hands with Wistful eyes and said,
earnestly:
"Once more life begins to look bright.
I am being educated in  goodness and
! stable with uo one, to lead him. His
i owner, inside, had allowed him to come
j out alone, believing he would go straight
j to the drinking trough. Instead, he
i strayed along the sidewalk. He was a
i horse whieh had a bad habit of kicking,
i and, coming near where the boy was,
■ he kicked him, though tlio boy did
nothing to provoke it. The boy w'as so
I badly hurt that a lawsuit was brought,
i and tho court said that the owner of the
j horse must pay damages ; liis horse had
j no business to be upon the sidewalk.
| Any one who lets an ugly horse, go loose
! upon the sidewalk must pay tor the mis-
; chief it does to persons who do not mo-
• lest it. It is no answer to say that the
owner supposed tha horse was trained
not to go upon  the walk.—A Lawyer,
) purity; you are doing it, my little Janet,
, with your sturdy honesty and simple, ' in the. Christian Vnion.
pure womanliness.    Oh. child, you cau j ~ "~~.     Z\
never know the world of good yon have -*-n Authors Labors,
doue me, tho new light and life that has !     Dr.   Prune's little granddaughter got j
come to me with your dear presence! ] into his lap, and after taking the pen out |
I think she is_yery lovely, sir," I an-' With yon I am good, my_evil temper is i of his hand,' asked him, demurely:
swered, quietly, "and must congratulate
you on your future happiness."
' He arched his heavy eyebrows comically.
"Won't she make my home happy?"
he criod.     "Won't  she   be  a  patient
exorcised.    I want you—I want yon for
my own wife!   Don't send me away!   It     n ...v.      	
will bo a sorry day for your master, my i little dot, you have beeu writing, writing,'1
, if yon refuse to marry him."       j every time I come; did you always writo '
"Grandpa,  how long have you been
writing in tliis way?   Ever since J. was a
Griselda?   She'll nover give a thought I to her."
darling,
"But   Miss   Baymond,"   I   gasped,
shrinking from him.    "You are engaged
to other men's admiration after the knot
iB tied—no, not she! And she'll look well
afc  the   head of my table; these large
'I am not—I never was," he broke in,
eagerly a "Miss Baymond is nothing to
me.    Did you think I. coidd many such
women make a much better appearance ' a woman,"'Jauet,  witii you before my
eyes? I have never made love to hor;
she knows I would never marry her. I
have uo faith in women outside of you,
and you would not blame me, my darling,
than small ones do.'
' 'Please do not speak so; I wish you
wouldn't. Indeed it is not honorable,"
I broke in.  __.	
He walked over to my desk, looked at; if you knew all my life. Like Diogenes
me with a queer expression.
"Oh, pray continue! By all means j or woman in the world until I met you,
show me my duty, to my future wife, nee j I have been a bad man, too, and my
Miss Helen Baymond!" Janet, you cer- ; hoart fails me that such a pure little dove
taiuly missed your vocation; you should j -will never nestle iu my bosom; but,
have gone in for tho pulpit or the plat- j please God, if you will come to me, I will
just so?"
i     Then  her   grandfather told her how,
\ long he had been writing for other peo-,
| pie's pleasure and profit. ,
i     "Tlie first piece that I ever wrote for •
the New York Observer was printed in j
that paper April 7,   1838.    From   that,
time  to this,  about forty-three   years, j
with a brief interval, I have been writing I
every week,  and almost every day, for j
the Observer.    It is curious to see how J
much ojie writes in such  steady work, i
form; those  demure eyes* would surely
have gained you many a convert.    Now,
by way of. a„rewar<l ipr yojir defence of
the absent, lefc me tell you CIIiu Kex pw?fe
ing advice was to get rid of you as soon j
as possible—a man would be so much ;
morn useful."   Suddenly laying his hand '
over mine, pen and all,    "What do yon
know about how much in earnest 1 eould ;
be?   Thera—don't be jjrudish—I sjiau't I
hurt   you!"    Then,   abruptly  walking
I doubted if there were an honest mau | Suppose   a minister writes sixty pages
every week in making his sermons (less
than ten pages a day, and he can easily
write ten pages in an hour or two) he will
write 3,000 pages in a year, or ,'H),000
pages in ton years, or 120,000 in forty.
I have written on an average more than
five columns each week for forty years,
or 10,000 eolums in all; at least 100 volumes of 400 pages each."—Cincinnati
Commercial.
hand..    "You have known me more thau j away, ""Bah!   you^women^malteT grand !
four mouths, and we have never yet
shaken bauds.    How is that, Janet?"
"I did not know that clerks generally
shook hands with their employers, ^ir.
Good-night and Merry Christmas." And
folding both hands demurely in my muff,
I marched by, pretending not to sue his
outstretched hand.
I had but one purchase to make, a
small gray muff for Netta, and was soon
on mv way home at as rapid a pace as
the slippery, snow-covered sidewalk
would allow.
mistakes sometimes, iu spite of your
vaunted intuition. I could swear I love
my future wife with my whole heart—
and must positively be paid by the 15th
of the month."
I lifted my head in amazement at thn
sudden change in his voice. Mr. Jams
stood iu the doorwav.
Por tdl Mr. Ohisholm's assertions I
would not have changed places with Mibs
Baymond; better be his clerk and  be
strive to be worthy of your precious love.
Bichard Steele says 'a good wife is a
liberal education.' Be my education.
This is my birthday, be iny birthday
gift. Janet. An you still thinking of
Miss Baymond? J. swear she is not and
never has been anything to me; don't
make mo suffer for the lies report has
circulated. I said what I did to try you.
Oh. my love, answer me! I am not
ustSl to*beggiug."
What need to keep him waiting? I
I loved him with my whole heart, -and it
j was a very happy little woman who put
Hvo hands in his, and a very beaming
'   ' c    that was hidden ou his shoulder.
\ The mystery was explained.  I, not Mis'.s
Bavmond, was   to   be  Mr.   Ohisholm's
! wife.
These events happened nearly five
years ago, and in all the time that has
passed since then  I have never once re-
I gi'etted tlie birthday present I made my
treated respectfully! than be Lis wife and i mas ter.     Netta's   at   sohool.     On   my
be sneered at.       * . ' husband's knee sits a small Mdes Chis
After all the evidence was in, a Galveston Judge asked the accused, who
was charged with stealing a watch, if he
had auything moro to offer. "I did
have aii old silver watch to oiibr you„
Jedge, but my lawyer borrowed it, aud
hasn't brought it back yet."—Galveston
News.
Many physicians claim that intemperance is a disease. It must bo contagious, then*; at any rate, a man who
gets drunk finally catches it when ho
woes home. There may appear to bo-
some little discrepancy or contradiction here, but we can't stop for that
now.
"Yes," remarked a musical critic, recently from Kansas, "tho fiddlin'was.
bully; but I tell you when that fat chap
with the big mustache laid hold of the
bass fiddle and went for them low notes
in the violin-cellar, I just felfc as- if a
buzz-saw was a playin' ' Yankee Doodle?
on my backbone."
'Twas .Sunday evo nud the mnall boy stood
With liia eye to the koyliole pressed,
And he eaw his ulster Bessy's head
On AbHulom Thompson's veBt
Then he run to his parent stern and told.
And the parent stem replied :
" There nin't uo harm In a vest; slide out,'"
But the lad refused to slide.
" There ain't no harm in u vest, I know,"
And his eyes Hashed bright that mlnuto,
" But Isn't it dangerous, dud," he asked,
" When AbBalom Thompson's in it 1 "
Outrage by a policeman: Sam John-
siug was up again yesterday. "What
brings you here this time ? " asked tha
Becorder. "De pliceman, sah; do
same what brung me heah last time."
"I mean what did you do?" "I was
jess passin' a grocery store, when J.
struck my head agin a ham what was
hanging by do dore. I tuck de ham
down to put it somewhares whar ii
would be safe from folks bustiu' their
brains-out agin it, when de fust I knowed
a pliceman tried to get de ham away
from me. and becase I wouldn't let do
ham go he jess brung me along, too.'.'
■A
The Unlucky 31.
Cant. John N. Boiinger, a steamboat
man of St. Louis, well known throughout the South aud West, has been devoting much   time   to   the   history of
Bteamboats.    He has found that steamers, and especially Western river steam-
mid" tripped a lady who wai I era, whose uames begin with  "M," are
The lady fell and broko j very unlucky.   It they have not been..
The Story of a Bean.
A boy iu Troy, N. Y., had a bean be-
twetf/i liis thumb and forefinger. Not
thiiv'.uug of doing harm he snapped or
shot the beau out of a window into the
street. The bean struck a mau on tho
no.se. The man jumped because it stung
him a little
walking by,
an mm. Her scream frightened a horse,
which ran away, smashed two carriages,
and, falling on tlw icy stoues, killed it
yet ."■   ^ean is a very sin all
self.    And
thing.
Op a miserly man somebody wrote:
"His head gave way, but his hand never
did. His brofo softened, but his heart
couldn't"
sunk, burned or destroyed by boiler .explosions, tlieir owners have met witii
financial disaster tlirough their means-
As proof of what he avers to be true he-
cites innumerable Magnolias, Missouris,
Magentas, Marys, Myrtles, Massachusetts, Metropolises, Marigolds, Missis-
sippis, Mayflowers, Monitors, Monticel-
los, and others with initial " M," alb of
which have come to grief.
'■